Going out in style > Now here is a cheery question which you will never be asked when calling Tonic … where would you like to spend your final moments?
Surrounded by loved ones? Gazing at a beautiful view? Perhaps even watching your Premier League team score a winning goal. Well, not according to Marie Curie Cancer Care, which reveals that most men would like to die having sex. No surprise there then!
The charity surveyed those in its care for terminal illnesses to find out this answer. However, while one in five men gave this predictable answer, the survey found that just 1.9% of women would like to go in the same way. It also found 10% of men would like to shuffle off this mortal coil down the pub – not that it would do much for the morale of fellow boozers. In comparison a far larger share of women would prefer to die somewhere picturesque or doing their favourite relaxing activity, such as reading or listening to music.
Among all respondents, almost two-thirds stated they would like to die at home and the majority of people (71%) would like to be surrounded by friends, family or loved ones. A tiny 3% wanted to end their lives in hospital, which ironically is the very place where most of us will spend our final hours.
Maybe the best of all worlds would be to die having sex in a pub. Though you would wish you were dead if ultimately you carried on living, as explaining your sex-and-booze exploit might be a tad difficult to explain away to both friends and relatives!
Ultimately, though, if you want to dodge the grim reaper for as long as possible, then move south, as this week the Media has been awash with the news that people in north England are more likely to die young. Live up north and you are 20% more likely to die before the age of 75 than those in the south. Just so you don’t make a fatal geographic mistake, the ‘north’ in this study includes the Midlands, while the ‘south’ includes East Anglia.
Iain Buchan, of the University of Manchester, UK, and his colleagues analysed Office for National Statistics death data from 1965 to 2015, dividing England into two regions. They found that, since the mid-1990s, the number of deaths among people between the ages of 25 and 44 have been rising. In 2015, there were nearly 50% more deaths among 35 to 44-year-olds in the northern area than in the south, and 29% more deaths among 25 to 34-year-olds.
Until we can find some use for such research, it is much better in the short term to adopt Woody Allen’s death avoidance strategy … “I’m not afraid of death – I just don’t want to be there when it happens‘.
You may also find solace in the Quality of Death Index. According to the Economist Intelligence Unit, the UK leads the world for care of people in the final weeks of their life. Something to celebrate in your final hours!
Footnote: On a more serious level, please visit our sister company TonicClinic if you have been diagnosed with a terminal illness, such as an inoperable brain tumour, and would like practical support.